Category: Ties

Tie o’ the Day #2 loves this bunny hat! In the yard sale? Yes! It’s not quite a set of Playboy Bunny ears, but the hat’s a symbol of my eternal Delta Rabbit-ness. 🐰 Next month is the Class o’ 82’s 35th High School Reunion. Geez, I’m ancient. Still feel 17, but with a boatload of wisdom I didn’t have back then. My body, however, does not feel 17. I notice my mortal coil is 53 only when I move or breathe. ☠️💀

Tie o’ the Day #1 is here to assure you that this hat will be for sale in the yard sale tomorrow! Ain’t the headwear speshul? It has frightened many a child when I’ve worn it.😱😲 You’ll be seeing black and yellow ties for a few days. It’s my gone Dad’s birthday next week, and I honor him with bee colors and bees. You might even see my bee tattoo. I just have to figure out how to do a selfie of my back in order to display it.🐝🐝

Tie o’ the Day # 2 is pleased to let you know that Mom is hangin’ in there. Tonight, she referred to one of the Care Center nurses as “the drug dealer.” She hasn’t snarked for a couple of days, so this was a good sign. She is trying to adjust to her situation, even though she describes her situation as “crap.” 💩

Bow Tie o’ the Day #1 schooled me. I had never thought of wearing a bow tie as a hatband. Ya do learn somethin’ every day. And I learned something I need to correct about wisdom I imparted the other day. Although hospitals tend to keep their temperatures too cold, at the Delta Care Center they create a temperature which I call Old People Heat. Hint: If you go there, wear only a swimsuit with your bow tie. 👙 Otherwise, you’ll have a run-in with heat exhaustion.

Bow Tie o’ the Day # 2 went to the grocery store with me tonight, and Bow Tie was on its most exemplary behavior. I told Bow Tie to pick out a treat for being so mannerly, and this is what Bow Tie wanted: a tiny, cute Demi Baguette of French bread. All of my ties have a weakness for bread. 🍞 My weakness used to be liquid bread. 🍺 Here’s a fact for ya: They do not taste like the same thing.

Tie o’ the Day #1 has exactly the right idea on this sweltering day. While I was taking a dip in the pool, Tie was grabbing a nap and a tan. Look at it there on its towel, stretched out on it’s back so its belly can catch the rays. And it has such a patterned decorative tan. Please note that Tie is smart as can be about its skin’s health: it uses tanning lotion AND sunscreen.

Tie o’ the Day #2 is proud to show off its idea for handling the I-Wanna-Wear-A-Tank-Top-But-It’s-Cold-Inside-Businesses Problem. Just do this: Throw on your tank, then throw a button-down, sleeved shirt around your shoulders. Next, button ONLY the shirt’s top button. Now, get your bow tie in place. And now, you’re ready to push the shirt back behind your shoulders. VOILA! YOU ARE MAGICALLY THE WEARER O’ A GROOVY CAPE! If you get chilly, put your arms through the shirt sleeves. Button the shirt if you must. Or simply pull the shirt around your shoulders for a bit o’ warmth. What a magnificent look! 🕶

Tie o’ the Day #1 and I are having an anger problem right this minute. We are angry that Mom is in pain. And we are angry that we can’t wear a tank top in this heat. The reason we aren’t wearing a tank is that hospitals (where I am spending so much time the last few days) are kept too dang chilly for wearing a tank, which makes hospitals kinda No Tank Zones. And when you walk outside the hospital door in a sleeved shirt, you immediately toastify. Stay tuned for my solution.

Bow Tie and I have been adoring the view from Mom’s hospital room window. Isn’t is precious? Don’t you think it makes the outdoor world look so wonderful that Mom will wanna get out of her hospital bed, run outside, and dance a jig on her new hip? She is being released today, but will be admitted to rehab in Delta later this afternoon. So get ready to see her boogie-ing all over the hospital grounds there. Mom’s so damn cool. 💃🕺

For three days, Tie o’ the Day has spent most of its time making phone calls and sending texts to concerned members of the phone tree, so we can all stay updated about Helen Sr.’s hip-y antics. In fact, Tie has had to charge the phone four times today. Tie is pleased to report that Mom is doing well, and she is still being her usual spunky, sassy self. A broken hip? Mom’s got this! 🏋️‍♀️💪🏻