Category: Skitter

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A Stinkin’ Weather Tease!

You know the sunny day of which I wrote this morning? You know the stunning sunniness of this morning when I put on my big, fat, ugly shorts– in which I planned to skip and hokey pokey under the blue sky all the live-long day? Today began innocently and blue-sky enough. And then the afternoon showed up, complete with black clouds, bigly wind, and bigly raindrops. The freshly-emptied garbage and recycling cans at the curb even blew over into the middle of the road. Skitter wouldn’t go for her walkie. For a brief moment, I thought I was living in always-windy Delta again.

Anyhoo… As far as I’m concerned, the bulk of this stinkin’ day’s stinkin’ weather stunk. This is Stinkin’ Tie o’ the Stinkin’ Afternoon, and I’m the stinkin’ skunk in the stinkin’ fluorescent green gas mask, trying to avoid the rest of today’s stinkin’ weather.

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Mother’s Day Eve

Flowery Bow Tie o’ the Day and Suzanne and Skitter and I made a quick trek to Delta, to visit this old dame– the original Helen Wright– at Millard Care and Rehab for a few hours. Mom was in the highest of spirits, as is her usual demeanor. She has a zest for life which makes me tired sometimes. She goes and goes, and goes some more. She makes me need a nap. I love her!

Did I mention Mom loves Skitter? Did I mention Mom adores Suzanne? Did I mention Mom has finally learned to tolerate me? I’m an acquired taste.

Actually, Mom has always loved me far more than I deserve. But I’ll take it.

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Skitter Visits The Vet, Grudgingly

 

 

Hey! This is the last mustache Bow Tie o’ the Day. It is made of painted wood. Its simplicity of design makes it a must-have piece of neckwear for my collection. I have a mustache-y necktie for tomorrow, and then that’s it for our Mustache Days theme.

Skitter doesn’t have a mustache bow tie, but she wore her little collar bow tie to see her doctor today. She needed two booster shots. Every time we walk into her vet’s office, Skitter shakes like she’s her own private earthquake. When her appointment is done and we’re safely home, she gets mad at me for hauling her to the vet. She pouts for the rest of the day– like I had set out to hurt her sensitive, canine feelings. Tomorrow, she will have forgotten all about the vet visit, and I will be tops on her list again. She’ll be all hyped-up to play with me while I’m trying to get some work done.

I, on the other hand, look forward to showing up for Skitter’s vet appointments. I hate that it makes Skitter shiver, but… When Skitter and I are waiting in the reception area or the exam room, she keeps her paw on my arm so she can be sure I don’t get up and leave her there by her skittish self. It’s so sweet when she traps me with her paw. In fact, it’s downright CUTE. And you know how I hate the word CUTE, cuz it’s overused! But The Skit’s trembling paw on my arm is truly one thing the word CUTE was intended to describe.

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Cinco De Bison

We celebrated Cinco de Mayo yesterday by participating in nothing resembling a Cinco de Mayo festivity. (You might remember Skitter had already cracked open her piñata a couple of weeks ago, cuz she couldn’t wait any longer.) Mustache Bow Tie o’ the Day helped us pack up the car for an afternoon excursion. We loaded up Diet Coke, water, and bug spray. And we loaded up Skitter. We did not load up The Saddle Purse. Off we drove to Antelope Island– which I always call Cantaloupe Island, convinced someone somewhere someday will think it’s funny.

We stopped at the beach as soon as we got on the island. The lake is so low that we had to walk at least 1/4 mile from the real beach to get to the water. It was the first time Skitter had walked on sand, and it was the first time she had seen a lake. She did well, despite her fear. She did not venture into the water. I think she actually had fun, even though she stuck to my legs the entire adventure.

Our beach-hangin’ did not last long at all. We were at war with the brine flies. We found ourselves in the midst of a near-Biblical true pestilence. We were outnumbered, and our bug spray was no match for the brine flies’ superior weapons of annoyance. They were ultimately the victors. Surrender can be a wise and glorious thing sometimes. When we got home I discovered brine fly bites across my forehead where my hatband had been, and poor Skitter had bites inside her ears.

We spent most of our Cantaloupe Island trip in the car, and we had a fine time. The afternoon was bright. The drive was pretty. We drove the island’s roads, checking out the bigly bison and a few antelope. I met a bison and a deer, and they each wanted a turn wearing Bow Tie o’ the Day. I obliged.

 

 

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Every Day Can Be A Holiday

Three nearly identical snapshots of Skitter in her Bow Tie o’ the Day is three times as good as one snapshot. Skitter was especially excited to be in the pix because today is National Piñata Day. She even had a nap in her sombrero this afternoon. After she eats dinner, we’re gonna take that colorful stick and beat the stuffin’ out of our taco piñata. I hope Skitter isn’t disappointed when tacos don’t fall out. I also hope I’m not disappointed when tacos don’t fall out.

[Yeah, I’m still working on my TMS-and-me post. I keep adding to it. It’s still coming.]

 

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Visiting Mom In Deltassippi A Couple Of Weeks Ago

M & M’s Bow Tie o’ the Day knows as well as anyone that a trip to see Mom at Millard Care and Rehab is a trip for Suzanne to see the other Mom also, as in MOM’S CRAFTS. Yup, Deltatucky is a two-mom town for Suzanne. I hang with Mom. Suzanne hangs with Mom AND the Mother of All Fabric Stores.

M & M’s Bow Tie also reminded me to deliver a very important gift for Mom. You see, every Easter season, when all the malted milk ball eggs show up in the stores, and the Peeps take their place alongside them in the Easter candy aisle, I buy Mom a bag of spiced jelly bean eggs. This year, when I thought about getting them for her, I figured I should skip it– since her blood sugar has been fiendishly high. I hoped she wouldn’t think about them this year. When I went to visit Mom a month ago, all she could talk about was the bag of spiced jelly beans I didn’t show up with. I wasn’t going to let that happen again, so on my last visit– a couple of weeks ago– I made triple-sure I delivered a bag o’ spiced jelly beans to her bedside.

Should I have given her such a sugary treat? Not really. But Mom is 88. She knows all about her high blood sugar. If she wants to risk eating a bag of Brach’s Spiced Jelly Beans so badly, she’s going to get ’em from me. I might be 55, but I am still Mom’s baby– and I do not say NO to my mother. Never have. Never will. My job is to spoil Mom. And I’m telling you right now: If Mom wants a six-pack of Budweiser to drink, a pipe to smoke, and a tin of Copenhagen to chew ‘n’ spit, I will get them for her. I will even barricade her door at MCR while she partakes of her vices, so she won’t get caught by her “guards” while she’s being bad.

BTW   When I was at MCR last time, I left Skitter with Mom in her room while I talked with a couple of family members in the hall near the facility’s entrance. Well, out of nowhere, here comes my pal, Katie, who takes such good care of Mom at MCR. Katie took one look at me and immediately said, “Oh, didn’t Skitter come down with you today?” I told her Skitter was in with Mom. And, without one more word to me, off Katie went to check it out I guess. Apparently, Katie was done with me. So I went back to the conversation I had been having with my people. Later, I looked for Katie throughout the day, but I couldn’t find her again before Suzanne and Skitter and I had to head back to the bigly city. I have always joked that it’s Skitter who MCR really likes to see show up, not me at all. Now– thanks to Katie– I know it’s not a joke. It’s true. Skitter is my ticket in. As long as I have her, I’ll be welcome at MCR. I hope.

[Note to Katie: I’m exaggerating that tiny story bigly, for the purpose of increasing chuckles. But I really did try to find you, and couldn’t.]

FYI   Yes, that’s Suzanne in one of the photos, showing Mom my purse. My purse gets around. I wonder if it “sleeps around,” as well.

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Something Somebody Somewhere Wants To See

My Bow Tie o’ the Day is tough to see. Its navy blue is dotted with green army men figures. Skitter’s Bow Tie o’ the Day is going patriotic with me.

On this Sabbath, Skitter and I are delighted to fulfill the wish of a multitude of our readers by showing you what it’s like to see up our noses. Some of you people ask us to do weird poses.

Or could it be that I simply couldn’t think of a post to write today?

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It’s The Hat

Skitter and I haven’t gotten out of our pajamas yet, but we have donned our smiley Ties o’ the Day. We are happy clams this morning, and we expect to have a grin on our faces all dang day. That’s our goal. Ties will lead us merrily through our day of vacuuming and writing. Oh, about wearing my John Deere Hat o’ the Day for the second day in a row: It is my go-to hat when I can’t quite decide which of my gaggle of hats best un-matches what I’m wearing. The hat’s green-and-pink plaid generally makes effective clash no matter what duds I sport.

People have asked me if Skitter minds being a neckwear model in my posts– you know, since she’s skittish about everything on and in the earth, as well as in the heavens above it. Let me just say this: Skitter tolerates it. She’s not askeered of modeling neckwear, but she simply doesn’t understand what the neckwear photos and ensuing fuss are all about. I have often heard her mutter under her breath, “What the gobstoppers is up with this?”

Skitter is unaware she’s a star. She also doesn’t know that even our readers wonder what the gobstoppers the posts are all about. The posts just show up on the website, or on Facebook, or in their email. People read them or don’t read them. And still, I write posts and poetry. And still, Skitter watches me while I plunk away on my laptop. And still, even I have no clue what’s up with this venture, or where it will lead me. (Suzanne says there’s a book in it. I will cogitate on that.)

Things don’t have to have a clear purpose. Experiencing them– and deciding to find personal meaning in them– is plenty more than enough reason to engage in pursuits that interest us, no matter how odd those interests might be to others. Or even to ourselves.

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The Wheels On The Car Go ‘Round And ‘Round

Skitter and I– and Bow Tie o’ the Day– jumped out of our beds this morning and said to each other, “Hey! Let’s get ourselves into the car and go visit Helen, Sr.!” And so we did.

I always enjoy my visits to Millard Care And Rehabilitation. I get to see my former bishops, school teachers, church teachers, bosses, neighbors, coaches, etc. It is somewhat strange to see them “old.” They resemble their young selves enough that I know who they are. In fact, I know most of the MCR residents. That’s an effect of being from a town small enough that you know everybody. I knew these folks as I grew up, and I know them now as we all grow older. MCR is like a rickety, hard-of-hearing, cane-and-walker version of the “real” Millard County.

I’m always amazed by how much laughter I hear wherever I go in MCR. Staff and residents share a genuinely playful banter with each other. I know it sounds cliche, but it really does feel like family there. The staff is always trying to feed me like I’m family, too.

Like in any family, there are a few “problem children” who live at MCR. In fact, I have seen a sourpuss or two among the residents. Oh, well. I remember those fuddy-duddies when they were a heckuva lot younger, and they were sourpusses even way back then. People gonna be who people gonna be, I guess.

I met someone today at MCR who Mom has raved about since she was in MCR with her broken hip almost two years ago– Tess Greathouse. I have always known Tess’ family, but I had never actually met her before, since she is decades younger than me. As Skitter and I were walking to Mom’s room, Tess stopped me and asked if I was Mom’s daughter, and almost before I could answer, Tess’s hand shot out to shake mine. I don’t think I have ever visited Mom at MCR without her telling me how much she enjoys Tess reading stories to her. She loves Tess. Tess is one of Mom’s blessings, that’s for sure.

Jeez, Mom has more blessings than anyone else I know. I might need to borrow some one day.