Category: Family

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Suzanne Performs Miracles

OMGolly! Last evening, Bow Tie o’ the Day pinned me down, and Suzanne opened up every makeup bag she owns. I mean– I was simply reclining away in the loveseat, watching LIVE PD. Suddenly, a foundation brush was headed my way. And then eyeliner went everywhere except where it was supposed to go, cuz I couldn’t quit blinking when Suzanne was applying it. I kid you not: she had to wipe it off and apply it a second time. And then it felt like the mascara applicator was gonna poke my eyes out every time it got near my eyeballs. Suzanne asked me when I last applied mascara to my lashes. The answer is 7th Grade and once was enough. I must admit that last night I did enjoy the application o’ the eye shadow. The lipstick is so me, the way its color pops out. You know how I like a dash of bright color. Suzanne told me her philosophy about wearing lipstick has changed. She used to wear calm, blendy colors, but now she thinks if you’re gonna wear lipstick, people ought to really, really, really see it. See what happened there? My loud Clash Fashion style has rubbed off on her face a little. BTW Do you know what most weirded me out about this whole affair? Lipstick on the rims of my Diet Coke cans. I wondered who had been drinking out of my cans.

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A Bunch Of Steps Forward, One Step Back

I’m wearing as many horseshoes as Bow Tie o’ the Day can display. My goal is to summon good luck from every avenue possible– to make be feel better again. I’ve been thinking I might even conjure up a witch potion or voodoo spell, just for good measure. I think I have a cookbook for those concoctions somewhere. I am in my second day of being MISERABLE, after weeks of improving every day. I’m not worried. I’ll be fine when whatever this is passes. However, maybe it’s a sign I need to slow down in getting back to my chores and normal activities, so I’ll try to ease up on proving I’m all better. This photo shows you my activity for the day. Here I am, vegetating on my recliner. I’ve got my pillows strategically placed around my belly, and I’ve got my Roy Rogers/Dale Evans pillowcase covering the pillow behind my head. Suzanne made the pillowcase for me, of course. And she also made me the Grinch blanket which is warming me. I like the blanket so much that I use it all year, not just at Christmas. BTW Y’all are probably tired of reading about my surgery and recovery for the last two months. I’m sorry. I’m sick of the topic too, but it’s what my days– and the ties’ days– are/have been filled with. The neckwear and I are eager to embark on actual adventures we can share. We wanna do stuff. We wanna be more interesting to ourselves and to you folks. Stay tuned. We’re working on it.

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Should I Stay, Or Should I Run?

Tie o’ Yesterday saw I was in a panic, and suggested I put my running shoes on to make a quick escape from the house, because Suzanne had told me that after she got home from work she was gonna put makeup on my old face for the TIE O’ THE DAY post. I had promised y’all I would do it, and I will. Well, I was not quite psyched up for that to happen yet. I’m working on it. But it turns out I didn’t need to run. I got out of the whole deal another way yesterday: my entire torso took a step back in my recovery. I’ve been touting how well my recovery is going, and I suppose I should have knocked on wood or thrown salt over my shoulder, or whatever else you do to ward off bad mojo when you brag about how lucky you are. Yesterday was the worst day I’ve had in over a month. I hurt. I’m uncomfortable. I’m miserable. (And I’m worried I’m not gonna be healthy enough to go on vacation as scheduled in three weeks.) Today, my body feels only slightly better. I don’t think I did anything to cause this whatever-it-is. The day before, I did a bit of lifting, but nothing more than a couple of pounds: a stack of five books; a bag of two packs of Popsicles; a few bottles of water in a bag; a fluffy new dog bed for Skitter. And nothing hurt at the end of that day, despite me doing all that not-bigly lifting. But I’m sitting here wondering if what’s going on in my innards is just a normal part of healing, or should I call 911. Nah, it’s not 911-worthy. Anyhoo… That’s why I didn’t write a second post yesterday. I know y’all missed seeing the second piece of neckwear o’ the day. I can assure you that my makeup pic is coming up as soon as I quit groaning long enough for Suzanne to slather makeup on my happy face. Last week when I told her it would make a hilarious post photo, she immediately ran up the stairs and came back down with a dozen cosmetic bags. There’s no stopping her now. I just hope I don’t end up looking like I’ve been to the mortician.

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I Go To Such Exotic Places

Suzanne told me she needed sand. I was hoping she was planning to build me a sandbox to play in, in our backyard, but it turned out that she actually needed sand for some wild gardening adventure she thought up. Off we hauled our butts– and Bow Tie o’ the Day– to Home Depot again. Sand weighs a lot, but it doesn’t cost a lot. I like that. Of course, I’m not allowed to do bigly lifting these days, so Suzanne had to do my usual hefting job. When I’m myself physically, I tend to stay in shape by lifting things for her. When we’re out shopping somewhere, Suzanne inevitably gets her arms full of stuff and then asks me to hold her purse. Out of habit, she asked me to hold it a week or so ago, and out of habit I obediently took it. Bad move! I guarantee you her purse weighs more than any bag o’ sand you can buy at Home Depot. I know for a fact it weighs more than Skitter, because I weighed each of them. 🏋️‍♀️ (I do weird things like that when Suzanne’s at work and I’m home alone, procrastinating sitting down to my daily writing routine.) BTW When I was shooting these selfies, the sun was directly in my eyes, which accounts for the expression on my face in the photo with BatSuzanne in it. I appear to be  avoiding a punch I see coming my way in a UFC fight. 🥊 😸

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A Day Of Rest. Same As Every Day Lately, For Me.

Church Bow Tie o’ the Day rode with me to Spanish Fork to meet my Sister Who Wishes To Remain Nameless. I picked her up and we cruised to Provo, to Bishop Travis’ ward. (Yes, I drove that sorta bigly trip all by my li’l ol’ self.) Meeting my SWWTRN is always a highlight, cuz it’s the only time I get to spend time with her, since I rarely travel to Delta anymore. Whenever I was in Delta, she and I– and Mom– attended Sacrament Meeting every Sunday. Sitting in a chapel pew not talking with people you love is a pretty good way to aid you in getting a spiritual bump. I highly recommend it. And having a not-talking conversation like that can help fortify the relationship you have with whoever you sit. I call these kinds of pow-wows “not-conversations.”  A not-conversation doesn’t have to happen only in church though. You and whoever you choose to not-conversate with can have a not-conversation anywhere you please. I don’t recommend it as the only type of talking you engage in. If you did that, you would bore each other into wanting to run screaming across the Delta overpass. And you wouldn’t learn much about the person you’re with or what they think. I can tell you from my own experience that Suzanne and I have sometimes had not-conversations during which we both started laughing at the same time. Heck, we probably think the exact same funny things, at the exact same time in our separate heads. Ah, the mystical magic of not-conversations.

 

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It Wasn’t Sunday Brunch. It Was Thursday Chow.

Wood lobster Bow Tie o’ Last Night clawed its way to STELLA GRILL with us. We had to be in SLC to finalize and pay for our upcoming flooring installation, so we figured we’d eat a bite at yet another restaurant where we’ve never eaten before. Also, a decades-long pal of Suzanne is the chef there. Despite Bow Tie’s presence, I didn’t order lobster. But that’s only because it’s not on the STELLA menu. Bow Tie’s claws open and close, so I sort of demonstrated it to you by pulling one of the claws open wide before snapping this photo. And hey, the hat I’m wearing has become my fave hat of the summer, as evidenced by the fact that it seems to be showing up in these pics quite often. I used to think these flat-billed caps were stoopid, and then I found this hat. I liked its colors, so– true to my daily adventures in Clash Fashion– I added it to my pile o’ hats. Once I tried it, I liked it. It’s kinda interesting how much what we wear can influence our attitude as we move through our day. For example, I’ve been pajama-ing almost 24/7 for the last six weeks, and I think it has helped me to stay relaxed– which is what I’m supposed to be doing. To keep my fashion spirits up while I’m on medical house-arrest, I rotate different pj’s frequently, and I mix up my pj’s so they clash. We should all probably try more things; expand our boundaries; push our way out of the envelope; bust through the walls of the box; ignore the supposed-to’s; and mix it up. Get this party started!! You’ll see new possibilities in yourself. And you’ll see the world from perspectives you haven’t yet imagined– because the world will see new possibilities in you. I promise.

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It’s A Little Nipply In There

These two Bow Ties o’ the Day are cold-weather sports enthusiasts, and this is the best way I can indulge their frigid whims and needs. This photo shows you our freezer is bustin’ out with sugar-free Popsicles and some not-sugar-free ice cream. Just for me. I’m not a huge fan of Popsicles, but for some inexplicable reason, they have tasted fantabulous to me since surgery. I eat at least a dozen per day. Cold feels good in my layin’-around gut. Who am I to argue with my recovering belly? BTW I’m currently shivering with anticipation. Suzanne told me she’s allowing me to drive this afternoon. Finally. I’m guessing that what changed her mind was that she thinks I made her sound like an ogre in a post yesterday when I wrote about her overprotective attitude about me and my healing up properly. I’m glad she took it that way, I guess–cuz I now have permission to use my car keys. I know her conservative orders regarding my recovery are because she has my health in mind. She’s got no ogre-ness anywhere in her soul. I just know I better not wreck when I head out on my first drive– so I don’t have to spend a fortnight listening to her say, “See, it wasn’t time for you to drive yet. I told you so.” 👹

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I’d Rather Do Nothing Somewhere Else

Bow Tie o’ the Day ate brunch with us in SLC at PAGO. We sat on the patio and wished winter never shows up with its chilly temperatures that will prevent us from hangin’ outdoors. A month from tomorrow, we’re off on vacation to Dauphin Island, off the coast of Alabama. Suzanne wanted a beach, and I wanted a place that isn’t bigly touristy. We scheduled the trip before we knew I needed surgery. But I WILL be ready to vacation! The trip has sorta been my incentive to follow all my post-operation rules for healing up. Suzanne has been extra obsessive about my following the doctor’s orders. In fact, she has made up her own orders for my safe recovery behavior. For example, she won’t let me drive yet, and we’re past the time the doctor said I could. “Yo, Suzanne! It’s driving! It’s not rolling a pickle barrel up a mountain!” But hey, there’s a vacay light at the end of the tunnel. And if I still don’t have my normal stamina while we’re on vacation, what’s the worst that can happen? Oh dear me, I’ll have to just lie on the beach the whole time, do nothing more than sunbathe, and gander out at the ocean. Poor me. 😿 🏖

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Loveseat Recliners And Bank Accounts

Floppy Bow Tie o’ the Day caps off my Clash Fashion statement to the outside world. Here we are at R. C. Willey on a reclining loveseat– which Suzanne bought me this morning, cuz she thinks I need to do a ton o’ reclining while I recover. Plus, I’m old and I creak. Getting older is bound to make me even creakier. Reclining in a comfy loveseat can surely help our creaks and pops calm down. Anyhoo… I feel it’s important to tell you that although we are making a bunch o’ bigly purchases right now, we are not rich. We are not Rockefeller’s. We’re just frugal, and we know how to patiently save. For example, Suzanne built up The Recliner Fund for two years. I write about our purchases, not to show off, but because it’s what we’re doing right now. On these posts, I write about my ties and my life. I hope I do it with a dab o’ wit. And I’m gonna tell you about whatever adventures I experience, whether you wanna hear about them or not. 🤡 🛋

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Blinded By The Blinds

Yesterday, Bow Tie o’ the Day and I couldn’t wake up enough to drag our butts out of bed–all day. But when Suzanne got home from work, she ordered us to wake up and proceed directly to Budget Blinds with her. Yup, she hasn’t let up on getting new blinds. She says we don’t need to get them right now if I don’t want to, but I know better than to listen to her talk about not wanting new blinds ASAP. I ain’t gonna make waves. So we picked out very not-budget blinds, and got a very not-budget estimate. 💸 💰 🙀 BTW You voted for me to grow out my hairs, and I’m doing as you commanded. And, as you can see, my hairs are currently in a hideously awkward stage. Gee, thanks, y’all. 👏🏻