A Summary Of Suzanne’s Birthday

Well, I was there in my magnetic, wood punch-hole Bow Tie o’ Suzanne’s Birthday. My beach hat alerted me to the fact that since I shaved down all my head hairs, my hats are too bigly. Hey, it’s a look, right?

We watched movies—The Shape of Water, and Babel—and ate popcorn. The birthday cake, truffles, and cookies I ordered from Milk Bar showed up on time. I installed a mammoth “57” formed with Post-it Notes on the wall, which was my feeble attempt at being artistic. When I’m trying to get my craft on, I wisely keep it as simple as possible, so I can’t screw it up into an all-out hideous decoration. The “57” wasn’t too icky.

For eats, I made clam strips for Suzanne for breakfast. And I surprised her with a dinner of Happy Meals because she makes me happy. When we lived in our SLC apartment which we called The Kingdom of Scary Yellow Carpet, in 1986, I created a hanging sculpture of empty Happy Meal boxes in our living room. So, after dinner last night, I made an attempt to recreate that hanging sculpture from the past. It brought back memories of a time when we were young and poor and always in school or working—and our hanging light fixtures weren’t nearly as nice as the ones we own now. And finally last evening, to top off her birthday, I sent Suzanne on a treasure hunt through our domicile which culminated in her uncovering a pile of what I call Chips On A Chair, as seen here. You see, although she enjoyed the expensive and luscious birthday cake, Suzanne always falls in deepest, truest love with whatever potato chip she’s with. 🤡🍟🍔🥔🎂

BTW Suzanne was overwhelmed with the birthday wishes some of y’all sent her yesterday. She says THANKS. She also thanks to y’all for reading TIE O’ THE DAY. After this many years of showing off my neckwear and telling stories, I don’t think she’d let me quit writing it even if I wanted to: it keeps me out of her hair.