Month: December 2018

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The Pendulum Is Stuck

Ties o’ the Day display some mighty clever snowbeings.  The cleverest, in my opinion, is the snowman from England in the 16th Century. A clean beheading is always a festive thing. LA’s breasticled snowgal is a close second fave of mine.

Sorry my text has been absent in the last few posts. Remember all that blah, blah, blah I wrote last week about my current bipolarity vacation in the familiar territory of Depressionville? Well, it’s got me wordless. Even TIE O’ THE DAY can’t seem to get me yammer-writing tales or tidbits so I can write a proper post. The yammer will come back. It always does. Might be this afternoon. Might be who-knows-how long. No worries, though. I know my bipolarity’s tricks, and I always eventually whoop its ass.

I hope you’re still enjoying the holiday neckwear. My ties make me proud. I guess I’ve raised ’em right.

HOLIDAY TIE TALLY: 44 Bow ties. 95 Neckties.

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A Night Not At The Opera

Bow Tie o’ Last Night spread its Christmas cheer at a new-to-us restaurant find in SLC. In the past few months, I’ve had out-loud conversations with myself about wanting to dine at CURRENT. I’ve googled CURRENT’s menu, and I’ve relayed to Suzanne my enthusiasm about wanting to try the place. So yesterday, when Suzanne said she’d made a reservation for dinner, I was hoping this would be the place. It was. And it is. It is a keeper (pun intended). CURRENT belongs to the same ownership group as my old go-to, STANZA, so I figured I’d be happy with the atmosphere and fare. We were not disappointed.

Golly, my sake-marinated salmon was a culinary pleasure. Suzanne surprised me by ordering the cod instead of scallops. If scallops are on the menu, Suzanne and scallops are the match. But not last night. Personally, I believe making a not-scallops decision was Suzanne’s way of spicing up the relationship. You know, you gotta change it up to keep it alive. You  have to keep your person guessing about you a bit. This was a bigly change-up for Suzanne. Subtlety is her mode.

Anyhoo… Dinner was a definite dessert-deserving meal. Two desserts, to be precise. And I wanted to bring a third one home, but I realized that would’ve been out-and-out sugar gluttony. I’ve been accused of worse. But I decided moderation was a wise course of action for once. (Since my surgery, I have been hungry, 24/7.)

In the photo, notice the background wall’s design of waves and fish. Hence, the place’s name: CURRRENT. It is attached to a bar called UNDERCURRENT.

I planned to get another photo outside the restaurant, which would have shown you my wint’ry cape, but the photographer fell through. Suzanne, it seems, forgot about the required TIE O’ THE DAY outside-the-eatery photo, and she immediately walked off to fetch the car– leaving me striking sexy poses in my cape, under the CURRENT sign, without being photographed while doing it. Silly Suzanne, forgetting a TOTD photo protocol. But the car was warm by the time she picked me up in the street, so that was good.

It’s a total mystery: I’ve tried a number of times to present the totality of my new cape here, but it seems to stay under wraps (pun intended) for some reason I can’t fathom. The cape’s glory doesn’t seem to want to unfurl itself when a photo can be snapped. My other capes threw themselves into the TIE O’ THE DAY spotlight as soon as they were born. But it’s as if this wint’ry cape is trying to remain hidden, like some sort of caped……crusader?

Is this particular cape super speshul? Is this particular cape full o’ superpowers it doesn’t want to call attention to? Is my cape trying desperately to retain its anonymity in order to successfully fight crime and boredom and blandness and whatever else it fights? Does wearing my cape turn me into some kind of superhero, and if so what is my superpower? Time will tell. Time will show. And I can’t wait.

HOLIDAY TIE TALLY: 40 Bow ties. 89 Neckties.

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Beauty Takes More Time Than I Have Left

Bow Ties o’ the Day and I have been on high clash fashion alert this afternoon because Suzanne, out of nowhere, texted me from her office that we are going out to dinner this evening. Date Night! (Not Bee Pig Date Night, which we haven’t done for months. Reminder to self: drain Bee Pig.) What you’re seeing in this picture is one of my attempts to wrangle my hair into a hairdo which won’t be unattractive and/or dangerous. This photo is incontrovertible, damning evidence I haven’t yet found a workable and appealing hairdo for my current hairs situation.

The list o’ things I need to do to gussy-up myself for a Friday night on the town is lengthy. I haven’t picked out the right bow tie yet. That always takes more time than I anticipate, because I end up getting pleasantly distracted in The Tie Room. The choosin’ o’ the neckwear for a public event is an exacting task. To me, creating the right clash fashion statement is both an art and a science experiment. And then there are the cufflinks, and earrings, and bracelets to be chosen. Oh, and I gotta decide on the perfect suspenders. It’s so hectic being a girl sometimes! Gotta go make myself stunning! But my giving spirit gives you these three Christmas bow ties to behold. Enjoy.

HOLIDAY TIE TALLY: 39 Bow Ties. 89 Neckties.

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Another Bow Tie Convert

This morning we are pleased to present the TIE O’ THE DAY debut of our guest star, Lucky McGill. Lucky hails from Texas, and is part of Diana Clark McGill’s family. Check out Lucky’s suave look. A tartan Bow Tie o’ the Day sets the ambiance for any day or evening of the holiday season.

As the fashion consultant that I am, I do see one detail that, if added, could blow the top off Lucky’s hot-ness. I rarely suggest the fashion option I’m about to ask Lucky to consider. It is THAT remarkable. It cannot be worn flatteringly by most creatures on earth. I myself have never yet felt like I could pull it off, so it simply lurks in the bottom of my fashion accessories quiver until I feel worthy. Just what accessory do I think Lucky could pull off? What added touch is it that I wish for Lucky to rock? A cummerbund. It doesn’t matter if it matches or not, although I have a feeling Lucky is one of those “matchers.” But I can definitely tell that Lucky is a cummerbund pup, of elegant fashion breeding. That is the rarest of rare.

Woofy Christmas, Lucky. Drop by any time you want.

HOLIDAY TIE TALLY: 36 Bow ties. 89 Neckties.

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Ties Help Me Tell My Stories

Pieces of neckwear can act like a trail of clues, as mine are doing this afternoon.

I wrote in my earlier post that I had woken up on the wrong side of my bipolarity this morning, so I wasn’t feeling quite right in the noggin. After I posted, I realized I hadn’t made it clear which side of the bipolarity I woke up on. Well, it was the depressive side of the pendulum.

As of this moment, I’m moving farther and farther to that side of my crazy head. I know how my bipolar cycles work, so I know what to expect. Because of that, I don’t usually panic about the depression. So far, it has always passed. The pendulum always swings back to the middle. And then it swings to one extreme or the other again. There is no rhyme or reason to when the pendulum moves, which way it moves, or how long it will hover when it stops to taunt me.

Anyhoo… Bow Tie o’ the Day and kitty Tie o’ the Day are based on the movie BAD SANTA. I’ve never seen the movie. I tried to watch it, but drifted off in bored disgust. It was rank. I chose to wear these pieces of neckwear today because of my mood, which is dark, bad, mean, annoyed, impatient, paralyzed, weary, hopeless…….  It really is okay though, because I understand what’s going on. Even when it’s scary, I know it will pass. My mood will change.

Sometimes creating TIE O’ THE DAY gets me through a tough day: it provides me a purpose, when I don’t feel like I have one. I try to be disciplined about posting twice per day. If I do that, at the end of a day when I feel like a waste of soul-space, I can tell myself I accomplished something– however tiny a feat it might be.

CHRISTMAS VACATION Tie o’ the Day is the clue that tells you I was thinking it might be a good idea– in light of my below-down mood– to go in for some electroshock therapy. If it’s good enough for Clark Griswold, it’s good enough for me.

Rockin’ Tie o’ the Day is what I’m doing right now to try to bring my mood up a level or two. I’m in my loft writing, and listening to music: MUMFORD AND SONS’ recent release, BAND OF HORSES’ everything, and KACEY MUSGRAVES’ Christmas cd. So far that’s my playlist this afternoon. Music helps me deal with whichever extreme I’m feeling in my bipolarity, but I have to be mindful of what kind of music I choose during any given mood. Cranking up Hank Williams’ (Sr.) heartbreak songs is not conducive to moving out of depression. And listening to heavy metal is absolutely the wrong antidote for mania.

So far I’ve been able to successfully manage my bipolarity. I mean, I am still alive and kickin’. Knock on wood. Being alive is success. I am fully aware that my head disease can– and probably will– advance as I age. That doesn’t terrify me. I don’t know why it doesn’t, but it doesn’t. I am right here, right now. My ties surf my moods with me, always protecting me from ennui and danger. They’ve got my back. Actually, I guess they have my front, eh?

HOLIDAY TIE TALLY: 35 Bow Ties. 89 Neckties.

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Some Days Are Like That

I woke up on the wrong side of the proverbial bed this morning. I woke up on the wrong side of my bipolar head. I thought achieving the amazingly high level of clash fashion you see in this photo would certainly buoy my brain a bit. It did not. Even my first Christmas Jacket o’ the Day, combined with Bow Tie o’ the Day and Three Ties o’ the Day, hasn’t roused my story-telling spirit.

Be ye not afraid. It will pass. It always does. I’ve been through this before, and I’ve written about it before. I’ll again encounter this feeling a thousand times in the future, and I’ll write about it here that same thousand times. Lucky you!

It’s all good. I’m what is is known as a rapid-cycler, in terms of bipolarity. My mood will switch soon. I’ll get jolly in the twinkling of an eye.

HOLIDAY TIE TALLY: 34 Bow ties. 86 Neckties.

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And Then Another Thing Got In The Way Of The Lost Post

I’ve managed to retrieve parts of the post that ran away from me this morning, so I’m re-composing the bits and pieces of it I’ve scooped up off the information superhighway to Hell. I still have no idea what computer key I touched that made my writing disappear. I’d like to know, so I don’t touch it again. Eventually though, I’ll re-create the entire post, but this post isn’t it. I was, in fact, working on it, and then it was time to pick up Suzanne for lunch. I completely intended to return home after lunch and salvage my little lost story.

So I fetched Suzanne, and she scarfed down her yogurt in the car. She and I decided we would spend the rest of her lunch hour whispering as loudly as possible in the Davis County Library in Farmington, a mere two blocks from her office. As I stepped from the library parking lot onto the sidewalk… OMHorribleGolly! A boys,’ black, clip-on tie! Dead! In the snow!

TIE-PHER IN THE SNOW! Oh, no! No ho-ho-ho! TIE-PHER IN THE SNOW!

This is a first for TIE O’ THE DAY: Dead Tie o’ the Day.

I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking I staged this. You’re thinking this is like all the other stunts I’ve helped my ties pull off– things like bow ties hanging from the chandelier, or hiding in the refrigerator, or swimming with a manta ray. No. Not this time. This scene, my friends, is absolutely real. All I did was see it, point my phone, and snap. (Besides, would I even own a tie this bland?)

I ask you: How many dead ties are layin’ around in the snow, anywhere on the face of the planet? Not many, that’s for sure. How many of those rare dead-tie-in-the-snow carcasses are in Farmington, Utah at the Davis County Library (a building I’ve never visited before) at 12:13 PM on December 5, 2018? These things don’t grow on trees. It is downright beyond-coincidental that I– an eccentric woman with a website starring ties– was the one person to find this pathetic tie’s lifeless shell, and send it lovingly to its eternal rest. Serendipity? Kismet? Dumb luck? I am mystified by the circumstances of our meeting, but I’m honored to have been the one to be there to take care of this sad affair.

Rest in peace, anonymous Tie o’ the Day. Rest in peace, Little Tie o’ the Day Doe.

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A Likely Story

So here’s the thing: I wrote a dandy, regular-size post this morning, but I touched some key that sent it out into cyberspace nether worlds. I’m still doing some spelunking to find it, but I have no idea whether or not I’ll be able to successfully recover it. I know y’all can’t go without your TIE O’ THE DAY morning fix so here’s the photo, with nary a story to accompany it. (Except for the story I just told you about losing the story.)

For your viewing pleasure: Star of David Bow Tie o’ the Day, for Hanukkah. Christmas tree Bow Tie o’ the Day. Christmas tree ornaments Tie o’ the Day.

HOLIDAY TIE TALLY: 33 Bow ties. 83 Neckties.