Day: October 11, 2018

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Ice Cream Is The Freezing-est Food Group

The things you do– they tell on you. Even Bow Tie o’ the Day can see that. Yup, that is, in fact, a teeny drip of chocolate ice cream on my chin. It’s not huge, but it is there. It might surprise you to know this, but I don’t have a make-up artist and a hair stylist to primp me every day before I snap these tblog selfies. I’m sorta wash-and-wear. As a result, this afternoon my chin tells on me that I have been eating ice cream for lunch again. What my chin doesn’t tell you is that I ate the last of the ice cream, so I’ve gotta go to Dick’s Market to replenish my supply.

To properly stock up on ice cream, you must have a plan. I can help you out with that. First, you must know that there are a number of premium brands of ice cream made with gobs of sugar and cream, and it’s better to eat no ice cream at all than to eat no-name brand, lard-laden ice cream. Go for the best. One extremely rich brand or another is always on sale.

Second, choose your flavors wisely. You never know what flavor of ice cream you’re going to crave at any given time. To assure that what you crave is always in the freezer, buy a well thought-out variety: A tub o’ vanilla is a must buy. You can eat it plain, or you can douse it with any of a variety of syrups– and you can load it with candies or fruits. Next, make sure you have some kind of chocolatey ice cream. And then make sure to get a fruity ice cream. And, if it’s to your taste, you need to stock an ice cream dotted with nuts too. You have to cover all the taste bases.

At the grocery store, after you’ve made your basic selections for the ice cream pantry you’ve made of your freezer, it is your duty to choose one Ben & Jerry’s flavor for your special self– for you only. It does not matter how much your little pint of ice cream costs. It does not matter how many calories of fat it harbors. We must think of that pint as our reward for getting our sorry asses off the couch to go grocery shopping.

Even if all we buy is ice cream.

BTW   Keep wearing your pink this month, to show your support for Breast Cancer Awareness.

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The Invisible Tie Woman

I needed a clothes hanger to help out Tie o’ the Day this morning. My face feels too tired to be in a photo. Sometimes that happens. And also, I’m planning to scrub the bathroom later, and I ain’t gussying up for that task. I hereby declare Pajama Day for myself. Suzanne’s just gonna have to miss out on a pj holiday until this weekend.

Despite the fact that I still need to take frequent pj days while I’m healing up, my daily to-do lists are getting longer and longer, as my surgery gets farther in my rearview mirror. For almost a month after my hospital adventure, my only daily chore was walking to the freezer for Popsicles, if Suzanne wasn’t home to retrieve them for me. And since Popsicling was my only chore, I didn’t even need to write a list.

After a few more weeks, I added a few routine chores to my to-do’s. Things like folding clothes, putting dishes into the dishwasher, driving myself to my own doctor appointments in my car, etc. Oh, and going to brunch. That’s my favorite-est chore of all.

I can cook and make the bed and do my own laundry now, so I write those tasks on my list. (I have never ever been allowed to do Suzanne’s laundry, for no discernible reason except that she has OCD about it, and is compelled to do it herself.) I can empty the dishwasher and put the clean dishes and pans in their places now. I can roll the garbage and recycling cans to and from the curb. I can run errands in my clutched truck. I grocery shop again. I can de-poop Skitter’s droppings from the back yard on Wednesday’s, before the HOA lawn dudes show up to mow.

An unfortunate thing about my torso feeling better, however, is that I am once again able to put on a bra. I no longer have an excuse to not wear a breasticle girdle. I hate when that happens.