Month: May 2018

Posted on

Just Sayin’

Bow Tie o’ the Day has a BIGLY request. For the Memorial Day weekend, can we please, double-please, triple-please call a partisan ceasefire? Let’s remember that those who have served, or are serving, in the military haven’t come from only one political persuasion. People of all races, religions, genders, sexual preferences, economic circumstances, political affiliations, etc., have served their country. Even non-citizens have served and died, for a country they love and strive to be a part of. Let’s lay down politics, and remember ALL who gave all. 🇺🇸

Posted on

We Get To Have A Second Bee Pigger

Bee Pig Date Night was a success, but too short. Skitter was feeling sick, so we just went to dinner, then hurried home. I chose to wear a formal, black-tie Bow Tie o’ the Day, even though we went to a casual place, in Bountiful, called PLATES AND PALATES. Not PILATES. We only spent $35 of our Bee Pig’s $94.31, so we can can use the balance to have Part 2 of Bee Pig Date Night sometime this weekend. I hope we don’t just go to Costco for toilet paper. 🐝 🐷

Posted on

Only If Suzanne Lets Me Do It. And She Will.

Bee Pig coin bank wears Bow Tie o’ the Day, and we spent the morning together. I always put my end-of-the-day change into funky Bee Pig. When Bee Pig gets full, I roll the coins, then make a bank deposit. I wanted to do something different, so I’m declaring tonight Bee Pig Date Night. Whatever we decide to do, we cannot spend more than the total of Bee Pig’s coinage. Today’s total? $94.31. To make Bee Pig Date Night even more memorable, I’m actually gonna pay with rolled coins. 🐝 🐖

Posted on

Quit Mumbling, Would Ya? What Did You Say?

Tie o’ the Day accompanied me to the audiologist, where I was told the cochlear nerve in my right ear has neuropathy. This news means the nerve isn’t sending proper electrical impulses, and I’ll need to wear a hearing device. Forever. But my Spock ear works. My mission now is to make my earpiece post-worthy and otherwise hip. It must complement the neckwear. Perhaps I can make it a trend. Suzanne will be happy I can turn down the TV, and that my most spoken word isn’t “What?” 👂🏻

Posted on

And Now, Bow Tie Has Playmates

Suzanne, Bow Tie o’ the Day, and I sat on a bench, under a tree, outside her office building for lunch. SPLAAAT! A bird offering hit the middle of my iPhone screen. Perfect aim! (Get the disinfectant!) We found a couple of shaded rocks– the size of Suzanne’s kidney stones– to sit on for the duration. We glanced over the lawn and noticed this corndog-looking mushroom. Of course, I had to buy a corndog at the Chevron, then go back to photograph this. Bow Tie made me. 🤡

Posted on

Bow Tie Wants Sand Between Its Bow Toes

Bow Tie o’ the Day’s displaying Suzanne’s haul from the Kidney Stone Fairy’s visit. Suzanne has birthed around 75 stones, plus a yard of sand, in her life. She’s kept a collection, cuz her kidney docs ask to see them. With her fairy’s gift of pail, shovels, rake, and hoe, we’re going to make a beach in our back yard. Under Suzanne’s pillow, the Kidney Stone Fairy also left tickets for a beach trip to Dauphin Island, AL in September. I think the fairy did an ok job.

Posted on

Suzanne Sleeps Like A Rock, Not A Log

I insist Suzanne put her humongous kidney stone under her pillow tonight. (FYI She made this bee pillowcase.) She deserves a reward for creating a gemstone. Wood Bow Tie o’ the Day offered to protect our little bundle of prickly rock until the Kidney Stone Fairy replaces it with a treasure. This, of course, gives me a task, since I guess I’m the Kidney Stone Fairy. What is a piece of kidney gravel worth? What is an appropriate prize? I gotta think like the Kidney Stone Fairy. 🤔

Posted on

I’ll Be Handing Out Cigars

Bow Tie o’ the Day is honored to announce a new addition to our family. Last night, Suzanne gave birth to this BIGLY kidney stone. Mother and stone are doing fine. Suzanne had no pain during the birth, and she even went off to work as usual. She was proud of herself, and she agreed our new baby rock should be introduced to the planet on TIE O’ THE DAY. It’ll save us postage, to not have to send paper announcements. We don’t yet have a name, however. 👶

Posted on

Who Snapped And Peeled This Polaroid?

7th grade, my room. Somebody snapped this pic during one of the parent-annoying sleepovers I threw. Bow Tie o’ the Day now provides coverage for a moon I caused. For once, I hadn’t created a moon with my own butt. Instead, I helped out this friend. (Mooning and streaking were BIGLY in the 70’s.) Me and my pals didn’t drink, do drugs, or smoke at my parties. I take that back. At one sleepless sleepover, we crushed potato chips, rolled them in paper, and smoked ’em. Rebel chicks! 🚬 🥔

Posted on

This, You Can’t Keep From Happening

My hair’s a teardrop. It’s an all-around teary morning, cuz I had to transfer Mom back to Ron’s safekeeping. I just bite the silver bullet Cufflinks o’ the Day, and put on my big girl Bow Tie o’ the Day, and attempt to muddle through. These days, every time I say my goodbye’s to Mom, she looks tinier, thinner. She feels more fragile to me when I hug her. One day soon, I’ll go to hug her and she won’t even be there– in more ways than one.