Witty & Wise Ties, Trivia & Lies
Police Tie o’ the Day has surrounded my laptop with crime-scene tape, so I can safely keep upping my bid online, on a silent auction prize I vow to win. I find out if I win the auction item tonight, when we attend a ritzy gala. There, we’ll participate bigly in eating and in the live auction. It’s a fundraiser for education, so the cause is pure. What do I covet? I’m bidding wildly on a ride-along with a cop. LIVE PD, here I come! 👮🏻♀️
Some days, even Bow Tie o’ the Day feels sorta sideways. We all do. We just can’t seem to face the day’s challenges straight-on. Oh, we’ll try, and we’ll muddle through in so-so form. We are all good pretenders and smilers when we need to be. Our minds will eventually focus. We’ll get ourselves back on track, following our various arrows in the right direction. Even when I’m at play in the fields of my bipolarity, I eventually find my footing and can fly right. So far. 🤞 ☘
Tie o’ the Day isn’t about me. It’s about the ties being all about the ties. Anyone with kids and/or pets knows that “it” is never about you. It is simply not possible to be a good parent (to kids or pets) if you’re all about you. Bow Tie o’ the Day– on Penguin o’ the Day, on Socks o’ the Day– reminds me of our dachsie, Vinnie, who appeared to wear a tux and bow tie, 24/7. He always looked as if he was heading off to get married. 🤵
Bow Tie o’ the Day and I are not fully awake. And yet, we have already hied off and back to the airport. Suzanne caught an early plane to Reno, for work. I am alone again, but Zombie-like in my I’m-old-and-can’t-get-up-early-without-paying-for-it-anymore stupor. I don’t wonder where the decades of my life went. But I’m starting to feel the truth that I don’t have many decades left. It won’t be enough time, but it will have to be. Hmmm… Who’ll take care of my neckwear when I’m dead? 👔 🎀 🤔
Pocket-Square-as-Tie o’ the Day joins Cufflinks o’ the Day to race our running shoes into a warmer season. It’s time to shed long pants and long sleeves. Feel the impending burn! As excited as I am to pull my shorts and tanks out of storage, I always niff, shedding a cloudy tear when I store my long-sleeved shirts. Moving them signifies the end of Cufflinks Season. Sigh. No worries! Plenty o’ etc. will appear here regularly throughout the summer. ‘Links will likely photo-bomb us occasionally, too. YEE-HAW! 👟 📸
No time for a weekend hangover. Blurred Tie o’ the Day helps me rise and obey my ever-growing to-do list. Stapler Cufflinks o’ the Day staple together all my little notes, written on bits o’ paper. This way, I don’t have to consolidate my tasks into one efficient master list. Master lists confuse me. Too many straight lines, making way too much sense. It works for me to use my scribbled shorthand, written on whatever scrap of paper is nearest. Stapled together, of course. 📝
The in-laws gave us this 10-gallon barrel to use as part of our emergency/disaster storage. I’m sure they meant for us to fill it with water, but I decided I can be thirsty for the duration of Armageddon. What I can’t do during Armageddon is have an unadorned neck. I have my 100-oz. mini-keg of Diet Coke, and I’ll share it, so we’ll stay semi-hydrated. I’m filling this storage container– aka Helen’s Ark– with as many of every species of neckwear I can fit inside it. 🚢
Bow Tie o’ the Day is a clip-on, covered in butterflies. I’ve been told that when I was a kid, I called Butterfinger candy bars “Butterflyfingers.” As for clip-on ties of any kind, I’m not a fan, but they tend to be cheaper. And with some too-expensive ties, it can be worth it to go with the clip-on version. I liked bow ties from an early age. When I played Young Women’s church softball, I wore clip-on bow ties on my baseball shirts. I was weird. 🦋 ⚾
Bow Ties o’ the Day are modeled by pieces from our “when pigs fly” decor collection. I’ve been surprised by unexpected revelations every day of my lickety-split existence on this planet. Big amazements. Extravagant, elaborate questions. And tiny things like bracelets, and fluorescent shoelaces, and bacon. Terrible things can astonish and perplex us, too. When people do horrible things to one another, we sometimes declare a collective defeat. Fear not! Pigs will continue to fly in on their compassionate wings, to save us from ourselves. Who knew?! 🐷 🐖
So I’m joyfully skipping around upstairs, picking out Tie o’ the Day, and here comes Suzanne– groaning and bent over like she’s in labor. Words are not necessary. One of those blasted kidney stones is stuck somewhere inside. We automatically took our roles in this routine. I handed her a pain pill. And she squat-walked back to bed. Tie choice was made easy: Tie o’ the Day displays Band-Aids and words o’ pain. Tie’s helping Suzanne rest and recover. We’re awaiting the impending birth of a rock. 👶